After a composition is marked, many children do one of two things: copy the whole essay out again neatly, or never look at it again. Neither is revision. Revision means choosing one thing to improve, changing it on purpose, and then checking whether it worked. This post gives a three-pass method for the second draft (第二稿), so your child fixes the biggest problem first instead of polishing commas on an essay whose story still has a hole in it.
The three passes
| Pass | Ask yourself | Original example |
|---|---|---|
| 1. 内容 Content: is the story clear? | Does every paragraph help the main idea? Where does the reader want to know more? | 「我很伤心。」 tells; adding what the child did and saw (「我低着头，一句话也说不出来。」) shows. |
| 2. 句子 Sentences: is each one doing its job? | Which sentences are thin or repeated? Can one of them gain an action, a look or a thought? | 「他很高兴。」 → 「他把奖状举过头顶，嘴角怎么也压不下去。」 |
| 3. 字词 Characters and words: is it correct? | Any wrong characters, missing words, or a word that does not match the scene? | Read aloud slowly; check any character you are unsure of in a standard dictionary. |
The order matters. A perfectly spelled sentence that does not belong in the story is still a sentence to cut, so content comes first and characters last.
Pass 1 — 内容：pick ONE thing to fix
Read the teacher's or the tool's comments and choose one point only: for example, the ending that stops suddenly, or the middle that jumps from the problem straight to the happy result. Underline the exact paragraph. A second draft that tries to fix everything usually fixes nothing visibly. A useful question is 「读的人在这里会想问什么？」 Whatever the reader would ask is what the child should add.
Pass 2 — 句子：expand one thin sentence at a time
Find two or three plain sentences in the key paragraph. For each, add only one thing: what the body did (动作), what the face showed (神态), or what the child thought (心理). For example, 「妈妈很生气。」 can become 「妈妈把筷子重重放下，一言不发地看着我。」 The new sentence shows the feeling without naming it. Keep what is already good; revising is not rewriting from zero.
Pass 3 — 字词：read it aloud, then check
Read the second draft aloud at normal speed. Where the voice trips, there is usually a missing word, a wrong character or a clumsy sentence. Circle every character you are not sure of and check it in a standard dictionary such as 《现代汉语词典》; do not guess. Keep a small 错字本 so the same mistakes are not repeated in the next essay.
A 15-minute routine for the second draft
- 3 minutes: read the first draft and the comments; choose ONE point to improve and underline where it belongs.
- 7 minutes: rewrite only that paragraph, adding actions, looks or thoughts to two or three thin sentences.
- 3 minutes: read the whole essay aloud and fix wrong or missing characters.
- 2 minutes: compare. Put the old and new paragraph side by side and say in one sentence what is now clearer. If the answer is 「没什么变」, the change was too small; try again next time.
Parents do not need to correct the Chinese. The most useful help is a question: 「你这次改了哪一点？为什么这样改？」 A child who can answer that has learned a process, not just a fix for one essay.
Try it on a real essay: get feedback on your child's composition, then write a second draft and see which points are now fixed.
Mark a composition and revise itWant to practise expanding thin sentences first? Read next:
Expanding Thin Sentences Method →Wrong characters costing you? Read next:
错别字 Self-Check Method →Sources
- Composition requirements and marking criteria are set by SEAB and MOE; check the current syllabus and specimen materials at seab.gov.sg. This post does not state any marking scheme or mark allocation.
- Character usage should be checked against a standard dictionary such as 《现代汉语词典》 or the school's materials.
- The three-pass method and routine are the author's own tutoring practice, offered as suggestions and not a promise of any result.
- All example sentences are original and illustrative.
- No exam-frequency, prediction or ranking claims are made in this post.